Mac sucks

Tuesday Feb 28th 2006

I’m sure all the Mac hippies are gonna just love this. I speak the truth. Let it be heard.

I just put this as an extended entry rather than a separate web page (which I did originally because it’s just.. really long. :-)

Why Macs Suck

This is my tale of woe from owning a Macintosh computer. Now bear in mind this happened in 2006 - so it’s not one of those rehashed old stories you hear all the time. Furthermore, compared to other “Macs suck” stories you see on the internet, I have proof positive why they suck.

I know the only people who will visit this web page are Mac hippies and I’ll probably get a lot of nasty e-mail because of it. Yes, I call ‘em Mac hippies. Deal with it.

A Mac hippie will nit-pick your argument to death - so I’m going to be grotesquely detailed.

First of all, the computer itself is not “bad”. I explained that here. I also explained there why Macs are instant corporate environment death. Maybe on the Left Coast they do things differently, but in every single major corporation I’ve ever worked for (and there have been a few), Macs only belong to the marketing department. Yes, the same hell-spawned marketing department you see depicted as fools in many Dilbert cartoons.

Second, other Mac users I’ve known over the years have been egging me on to switch. They shower the computer with compliments like “it doesn’t crash” and “it’s wonderful” and yes, they do say “I love my Mac” (which is just plain fucking weird… seriously).

Third, you’ve probably heard the old saying “Try a Mac! You’ll like it!” I did. It sucked. Not only did the Mac itself suck, but the way Apple treated me sucked also.

Fourth (and this is to dissuade the Mac hippies that always point this out incorrectly), software made by Apple is supposed to work on computers made by Apple. Right? Right. One company makes the computer. The same company makes the software. So if you buy a new computer manufactured by that company, and buy current software they currently produce, common sense would dictate it would work. Right? Right. There isn’t any gray area here. Mac hippies say there is - I say there’s not. NEW Apple Macintosh computer + CURRENT Apple software = Computer that runs it.

And here’s my tale:

On January 17th 2006 I decided I would take the plunge and buy an iMac. I bought this box for one reason: To edit video. Simple enough, right? Right. I was really excited about it. After all these years I finally decided to buy one. I decided to go all out and stuff as much options into the computer as I could that finances would permit. So I stocked it up with a 256MB Radeon video card and 1GB of RAM. At the same time I bought a DVI-to-video adapter and Final Cut HD Express. All this stuff is made by Apple so it should work with no fuss, no muss. After all, their television advertising claims that Apple computers will install and run things easily, right? So it’s obvious that software and hardware from Apple will work on their own computers.

On January 21st 2006 I bought a Canon ZR-200 Camcorder. I hadn’t received the iMac yet but I wanted to have everything ready to go. It’s a great camcorder, by the way.

On January 23rd 2006 I was tracking my iMac.

On January 24th I received the copy of Final Cut HD Express.

January 25th 2006, the iMac arrives. I’m happy with it. I decided not to install Final Cut HD Express just yet because I wanted to get used to the operating system.

Same day, I connect my camcorder to it using iMovie and it works. So far so good. I found some standard applications (like StuffIt) for compressed files and so on. Software is able to install easily. But hang on a second.. why is the iMac having such a problem connecting to my Windows share? I can connect with Ubuntu Linux to it just fine and the transfers are nice and fast, and obviously I can connect with other Windows computers as well. What’s the deal here? I followed the exact instructions written by Apple themselves (yes, I actually read instructions) and the transfers were as slow as molasses! Weird… RDP works fine but transfers are slow? Ever weirder…

January 26th 2006, I learn the wonderful (heh) world of basic functions in OSX. I discover I don’t really care for the dock. Diablo II also doesn’t run in anything but “Software 256″ mode - which shouldn’t happen. I have a brand new iMac with the best video card they offer. Blizzard has a native OSX installer (which I used) and this is the best graphics I can get?

January 27th, I do enjoy some of the other features of OSX.

Same day, I also really liked iTunes.

January 28th 2006, Final Cut HD Express does not work with my iMac. Obviously I’m pissed off about this. Some more info I didn’t write about in that blog post: I checked the Apple web site because obviously they must have some sort of “Universal” release coming for the Express version of Final Cut, right? WRONG. Pro version only, which is $1000 more. I call Apple and explain to them my plight. Here I am with a brand new computer and it’s worthless because it can’t do the one thing I bought it for. I called with the intention of exchanging the iMac Intel Core Duo for a same-model iMac G5. Apple wouldn’t do this. They instead decided to give me a refund, but would not refund me for my software or adapter because I had opened it. Sigh.. okay whatever. I am told I will receive an RMA in my e-mail to ship back the unit.

Note before continuing: Before all you Mac hippies say “DIDJA READ THE SYSTEM REQUIREMENTS BEFORE BUYING THE SOFTWARE?”, you’ve already missed the point, but that’s okay. Keep reading.

January 30th, 2006 - NO RMA ARRIVES in my e-mail. I’m pissed off. I call Apple. The rep on the phone says the RMA was NEVER GENERATED. Nice. Real nice. Oh, but that’s not the best part. I HAVE TO PAY FOR SHIPPING to send the fucking computer back to them. Sure, Apple waived the “restocking fee”, but I still have to pay to ship the darned thing out. Explanation? “The other rep should have told you that.” Nice to know Apple hires idiots who don’t relay important information like that.

Side note: Dell has never - ever - charged me for shipping to send something back. They always pay for it. Am I saying Dell is better than Apple concerning customer returns? YES. At least they don’t charge the customer to ship something back to them for a CONFIRMED RMA!!

What I said in that blog post was correct - at the time I was intent on buying another iMac (a G5 instead of Intel Core Duo), but that was before…

February 14th 2006. This is after the unit was shipped out on my dime and received by Apple in Elk Grove, California. I had called them previously the day it arrived to confirm they had it (I knew it was there from the UPS tracking number but called to double-check). They confirmed they received it and that the refund would be processed in “five to seven business days”. Six days pass and I’ve waited long enough so I call. Guess what? They never started the refund process. Sound familiar? Does this mean that if I didn’t call them they wouldn’t have lifted a finger? Who’s to say for sure. I got my confirmation number the refund would be processed in… wait for it… five to seven business days.

After I got off the phone with Apple I called the bank who issued me my credit card and asked them “How long would it take for a refund to be processed if one were issued back to the card?” They confidently replied “Less than 24 hours” - and they’re right because I’ve processed returns on this card previously.

February 21st 2006, the refund is processed (on the fifth of the five to seven business days).

After all this crap I dealt with from Apple, the company (not the computer), I said to hell with it. I’ll keep the software I have as a lesson not to buy another computer from them again.

I had some conversation with some Mac “experts” about what the hell happened. Here’s what I was accused of:

“Your network is programmed incorrectly.”

Oh, give me A BREAK. I’ve been networking computers for years. Ethernet is not a hard concept to master and a router is very easy to set up. I have never, EVER had any computer I’ve ever hooked up to the router have slow-as-molasses transfers, except for the Mac. Yes, the DHCP is set up correctly, YES it assigns IP’s correctly, YES, ping times were fast, YES I tried different CAT-5 cables, YES, YES, YES and YES. The Mac just absolutely would not “play nice” with Windows shares. And I will state again, I followed the instructions laid out by Apple themselves connecting to Windows shares.

Put it this way, I can use a LiveCD of Ubuntu Linux and it will connect to my Windows share with absolutely no problem at all. Transfers are fast and everything works. OSX is “unix based”. Wouldn’t it make sense that it would perform the same way when connecting to Windows shares?

“OSX doesn’t support Windows networks and you must be using a non-standard protocol.”

That’s funny, I thought TCP/IP was a standard protocol. Apple themselves states you can “Connect to a Windows network.”

Proof:

connectnetwork

Screen shot from www.apple.com/imac taken February 28th 2006.

“You must have had a bad network card”

BZZT. Try again. I was able to connect to the internet with no problems at all and speeds were normal.

“It’s your fault that you didn’t check the software specifications for Final Cut HD Express before buying it!”

Wonderful. This means Apple sells current software that won’t work on brand new computers made by them. Mac hippies always blindly miss this point, that being: If you buy current software made by the same people who manufactured your brand new computer, IT SHOULD WORK.

“Apple released a ‘compatible’ version of Final Cut for the Intel Core Duo iMac! You’re a liar!!!”

Oh, really?

finalcut

Screen shot from www.apple.com/rosetta taken February 28th 2006.

PRO version, NOT express. When I ASKED Apple about this on the phone, they said (and I quote) “We don’t have any plans to release a Universal version of Final Cut HD Express”.

“Why don’t you just use Final Cut Pro?”

Great! Got an extra thousand dollars I can borrow? That’s what I’ll need to buy the Pro version of Final Cut (it’s $1000 more than the Express version).

“Why don’t you just wait until a compatible version of Final Cut HD Express is released?”

You’ve gotta be kidding me. As if I’m going to sit around and wait for patches/upgrades/versions/whatever. That’s a waste of my time.

Now I’m going to say this again so all the Mac hippies get it into their thick skulls:

If you buy a brand new Mac made by Apple, this means that CURRENT software made by Apple should run on the Mac. It didn’t. You can spew all day long “Your fault! Your fault! You didn’t read the system specs for the software before you bought it! Your fault! It’s, uhh.. your network’s fault! Yeah! And you didn’t read the manual! Yeah! Uh.. you’re just.. a WINDOWS user (gasp) and don’t know any better! Yeah! Macs run perfect and always do! Yeah!”.. but you’d be wrong. Very wrong. I bought the darn thing because it was supposed to be an easy computer that would run things without complaint. That didn’t happen. Combine that with the crappy “We’ll do it.. maybe” attitude of customer support concerning returns and you can see why my Mac experience wasn’t the most pleasant.

That’s why I think Macs suck.

Want to make me a happy guy?

GET ME BACK THE MONEY I WASTED ON APPLE. $299 for Final Cut HD Express, $19.95 for the DVI-to-video adapter, and $35 I spent shipping the fucking iMac back to them.

ARE YOU AN APPLE EMPLOYEE? Look up the RMA: 7404761962. Get me my fucking money back, you assholes! For EVERYTHING, not just the computer. The software, adapter and the shipping I spent. $353.95.

—

I wrote this just to prove to all that Apple does NOT make perfect computers, nor do they have the best consumer practices in the world. Concerning Final Cut HD Express, they need to state in the online store verbatim when you add to the cart (not just on the software page) that it doesn’t work with the Intel Core Duo based Apple computers (yes, it is that important). Concerning their return policies, they suck and need to be rewritten. And concerning their follow-up on return policies, there was none. I can get any return from Dell processed in three business days or less. Apple? Pff.. yeah right.

I also wanted it documented what happened from start to finish concerning the whole “Apple experience” instead of having it in pieces.

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